Entropy: Descending into Chaos

How does one stop the spiral of chaos that comes upon as at times? When confusion and self destruction reigns. When agency seems like a joke, and dreams turn to figments and flecks of nightmares.

Glass scattering on sand
Prismatic destiny unveiled
Crystals and crystals
Dust to dust
Heat and chemicals
Glass
Shattering back
On everlasting sand

Entropy is defined as “lack of order or predictability; gradual decline into disorder,” according to Oxford Languages.

Somehow,

                                                                                  That has

                                            Become

My life.

I don’t really know what to do. I’m broken glass scattered across the sand. Technicolor shards spraying through the wind, kissing the sky, only to be forgotten in the dunes.

Where the hell am I, anyway?

Who am I anyway?

Did I ever even know?

So chaos is defined as “complete disorder and confusion,” according to Oxford Languages.

                                                                     And maybe

That has

                                Become me.

I’m certain that I don’t make sense anymore. I’m paranoid that everyone is noticing. That this soul has already disappeared in the wind. I’m lost. A ghost, caressed by the sun, thrown away, and buried. Maybe. Do I really know?

I think these things I share. They have become increasingly experimental. Aren’t I supposed to be building a brand? Aren’t I supposed to be building a following? Posting 10 notes a day? Engaging with the community? Making sure my Substack actually makes sense…

I can’t

                             I can’t

                                                                I can’t 

Not now.

                                                                                                  Leave me be.

The entropy has come for me.

Is this one a bit dark?

I don’t mean it to be.

I’m just a little lost.

I’m just a little honest.

I’m just unable to keep my thoughts to myself.

I think I always stop before I actually reach a point. Sometimes things build up. Feelings overwhelm us. Writer's block gets us. Burn out. Mental health problems. Loss. Life just being, you know, life…Then entropy gets us. Our life seems to move outside of our control. Like there’s this chain reaction from hell forcing us down a path that we can’t escape. Life becomes something that happens to us, not something we live. The world slowly delves into chaos as we become less a player and more a piece in the game.

In science, entropy can’t be reversed. There isn’t hope for that. In an isolated system, things will delve into chaos.

But humans are kind of badass, right?

Like screw physics.

Probably anyway.

Let's reverse entropy!

In our lives, at least.

How?

Hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahaha

Like I know.

Okay.

So I’ll propose a hypothesis. How about that?

I’m trying to have a routine of things that I do every day. Little things and big things that I have to do. Even brushing my teeth gets a round of applause, because any bit of order we impose on ourselves is something to be celebrated. I make my bed everyday now. It feels pointless, cause I just get right back into it and mess it up. But at least I did it.

That’s something.

It’s a start.

Cause life isn’t an isolated system.

You have friends.

Family.

Pets.

Hobbies.

Things that ground you.

So do me a favor. Test the hypothesis. Leave your own hypothesis in the comments. Tell me how it went. I want to reverse the entropy.

I just want peace.
Scattered glass
Rainbow flecks
Coalesce delicately

-Aether

I’m not entirely sure what to classify this post as. Perhaps, it remains something a little different, and maybe that’s okay. If you enjoyed this consider checking out more of my works. I think all of my posts are a bit unique. Another interesting one is Eternal Flame: Creativity, Hope, and Depression.